Dear Mr. Jones,

We, the neighbourhood-comity, feel that we have to inform you about our concerns. It seems to us that you should know how we feel.

Some of our children were once engaged in healthy youth activities, such as soccer, playing games, watching TV, going out, drinking too much, while occasionally demolishing public property and kicking total stranger in the stomach for looking weird.
You can imagine that we all lead happy lives, with our healthy children running around in their healthy environment.

We do not want to shout names or so, since we have forgotten the name of your kid, but since our children hang out there he has introduced them to something unhealthy. Considering it taking place at your home, we should let you know it worries us a great deal. One day, our children came home with dice. Instead of causing mayhem in the neighbourhood, they are writing! Writing on paper! Reading English books!
After a closer study, we found out this all was about using their imagination! About thinking and strategy! THERE IS A GAME TAKING PLACE IN OUR CHILDRENS HEAD! AAAAAHHHH!

We are and are absolutely devastated. Our children are thinking! And even worse, they like it. They are not using the old old-fashioned dice, no, they use dices that go up to 20! It is impossible! It's evil!

We can't forbid them to go to your place. That's very terrible. Just because we do not understand the game, we can't come up with arguments why it's wrong.
Let's not forget the first two rules of parenthood our comity has agreed upon:
1. Everything we don't understand is evil.
2. If our children do not put something on fire, they're up to something worse that that.

I think our point is made. We hope you will stop this madness, Mr. Jones. What else can you do? Just let them go on with this? Wake up, Mr. Jones!

So you should consider this a serious warning. If you fail to stop this, we will come to your house. We will take our +2 magical weapons and practise our fireball-spells. If you do not stop them from role-playing we will blast your house and slay you, like we did with that dragon last year.

So you are warned, Mr. Jones,

Best wishes,

The neighbourhood-comity

Back to Philosophers Guild

Home | Submit content | Contact | Legal info | Top of page

This website © Copyright 1999-2008, Arjan Wardekker.
All rights reserved.
All trademarks and copyrights are the property of their respective owners.